


He Almost Came In

by FeralSnufkin



Series: I Ache [2]
Category: Mumintroll | Moomins Series - Tove Jansson
Genre: Home is where Moomin is, Light Angst, M/M, Moomin is clueless, Moominhouse, One-Sided Attraction, Snufkin can't talk about his feelings, The feels just keep on coming
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-19
Updated: 2019-05-19
Packaged: 2020-03-08 06:23:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18888967
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FeralSnufkin/pseuds/FeralSnufkin
Summary: There are moments when Snufkin thinks about going inside. The Moomin House is always so warm and inviting. But Snufkin isn't a tree. He was never meant to put down roots anywhere.





	He Almost Came In

**Author's Note:**

> I was listening to sad music while I wrote this. Let me know how if you're liking the series so far, I basically live off of comments.

The rain had been coming down for days but that was one of the best parts of Spring. Snufkin sat on the porch of the Moomin House looking out into the rain.

“I think it’s going to flood.” Moomin said setting a cup of tea down in front of Snufkin.

Snufkin hummed a reply. He picked up his cup of tea. The smell of blueberries wafted toward him. He smiled to himslef. Moomin knew him like the back of his hand. There was just enough sugar in his cup. It was perfect.

“I learned a new word when I was gone.” Snufkin said, leaned over the table. His eyes were peaceful and half lidded as he gazed at Moomin.

Moomin’s eyes brightened. He scooted his chair in, already enraptured. “What is it?”

Snufkin had to look away from the expression Moomin was aiming at him. The urge to lean over and touch him was more than he could deal with on a good day. He looked out into the rain again. “Petrichor. It’s the smell of the world before and after it rains.”

Moomin thought the word over. He repeated it to himself under his breath.

Snufkin smiled at him, fondly watching his silly troll process the information.

“I like it,” Moomin said. “Petrichor.” The word moved like honey out of Moomin’s mouth. “Did you learn anything else during your travels?”

“Stories for another time.” Snufkin said. He didn’t feel like talking very much today. The rain was heavy in his bones and made him feel sleepy. “Tell me about your day.”

Moomin thought about it. “Well, I helped Mama make stew today. You should stay and have some later when it’s done.” He didn’t wait for an answer. If Snufkin wanted to come, he would. Sniff said Snufkin was like a wild cat. He couldn't be pressured to do things he didn't want to without his claws coming out. Moomin tried not to say too much. The last thing he wanted was his friend pushing him away when he got too needy. So Moomin decided to keep talking to fill the void between them. 

Snufkin listened to Moomin talk about his day. The troll’s world was so much smaller than Snufkin’s world ever would be. He wondered what it was like to need nothing else but the valley. Snufkin’s skin itched when the Winter came. He needed to leave no matter how much he wanted to stay. The world was too big to be left unexplored. He wondered what it would be like to stay in Moomin Valley with the others year round. To sleep with Moomin through his hibernation and wake in the Spring. To see Moomin’s face when he snoozed and, when he woke, to see the look of surprise when, for once, Snufkin had been waiting for him and not the other way around.

Snufkin drained his cup to give his brain something else to do. The rain was coming down harder now. The smell of carrots and warm broth leaked out onto the porch through the windows of the Moomin House. Snufkin had fish waiting for him back at his tent.

Moomin looked out at the rain. “It’s coming down harder. Will you be okay tonight, Snufkin?”

Snufkin smiled to himself. Moomin was such a sweet soul, worrying about everything. “I’ll be okay, Moomin. I’ve handled worst weather.”

“It’s not a matter of enduring. You shouldn’t have to do it if you don’t need to. We have extra guest rooms.”

Snufkin stared out into the rain again. It was moments like this that he almost hated his nature. Snufkin wasn’t meant to be indoors. He liked the open air. He liked the sun on his face and the chill of the moonlight. The Moomin House was lovely but he couldn’t picture hismelf staying there for longer than a few hours. He wasn’t a Moomin no matter how much the Moomins liked him.

“I’ll be fine outside.” He answered after a long pause.

He knew he’d said the wrong thing when Moomin’s shoulders slumped. His fingers flexed instinctually to reach out and touch his friend but he stopped himself.

“Will you at least stay for dinner?”

Snufkin felt the lump in his throat beginning to build. A wave of guilt hit him. “I caught a fish this morning. If I leave it, it’ll rot. That wouldn’t be fair to the fish.” He reasoned. “Maybe next time.”

Moomin opened his mouth to protest before he stopped. He seemed to think about it for a long time before he nodded. He hadn’t touched his own tea. He stared into the dark liquid.

A warm voice came from inside. Moominmamma was calling to them. 

“It’s time for dinner.” Moomin stood up and took the cups. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” He said to Snufkin.

Snufkin hated when Moomin said that. There was always an uptick at the end of the words. It was a question. Like he expected to open his eyes in the morning and wake up in the winter.  He expected Snufkin to be gone unless he asked to see him again. It made Snufkin feel guilty. "Okay, Moomin." he said adjusting his hat. 

A spike of panic coursed through him as he watched Moomin leave him. “We should go on an adventure tomorrow. Just you and me.” He couldn’t be with Moomin inside but outside, he would stay by his side.

Moomin paused in his gloomy walking. “Really?” His face brightened. “There’s a new cave in the Lonely Mountains I found last week. We should go explore it.” He bounced with excitement.

“It’ll be slippery.” He said. With this much rain, it could be flooded too.

“We’re adventurers. Danger is our middle name.”

Snufkin laughed. “I dare you to say that in front of Moominmamma.”

The look of horror that crossed Moomin’s face made Snufkin laugh. Moomin giggled with him after a second and they stood on the porch together, their laughter swallowed by the sound of the rain.

When they finally calmed, Moomin smiled. “I like your laugh.” He froze. “I mean, it makes your face look happier. Not that you’re not happy.”

Snufkin swallowed the blush threatening to cover his cheeks. “I like your laugh too. Your smile is lovely.”

Moomin’s face brightened. Snufkin longed to reach out and touch him again. The blush over Moomin’s cheeks and snout was beautiful and he wondered if he could make it brighter if he kissed him.

Snufkin realized what he was thinking and it hit him like a bucket of cold water. He tucked his hat over his face. “Have a good dinner, Moomin.”

Moomin blinked at the sudden change but his eyes stayed lovely and soft. “You too, Snufkin. Enjoy your minnows.” The cups clinked in his hands as he walked into the house.

Snufkin looked at the gentle light from inside the Moomin House for a brief second. He stood at the top of the stairs and step toward the door. He could do it this once. He could come to dinner. Maybe Moominmamma could add his fish to dinner. They wouldn't be wasted then. His hand was on the doorknob. 

He hesitated a second too long and the itching in his skin consumed him. He sighed. Just thinking about the house made him feel claustrophobic. There was a reason he usually leaned into the window from outside to spend time with the others. On a good day, he could go inside and be with his friends but as Winter came closer, he couldn’t get himself to do it anymore. He wanted Moomin to understand but he wouldn’t. Moomins liked company constantly. Snufkin couldn't be like that even if he tried.

Snufkin held onto the idea of their adventure tomorrow. They would have fun tomorrow even if today ended bittersweetly for him. He found his tent in the darkness and crawled inside. The minnows were cold that night but they tasted like the outdoors. They were delicious.

**Author's Note:**

> Two out of five down! Get ready for the next heartbreak!!


End file.
